hold it
i think there are certain decisions we have to make in every day life that separate the good guys from the punks. one such decision, in my opinion, is deciding under what circumstances to hold the door for the person behind us. i think in a communal place where everybody knows everybody, like an office building or school, people tend to hold the door. in school a lot of times i find that people are usually getting to school at the same time and thus it’s not really a conscious decision to hold the door, there are people in front and behind you so it’s more like a reflex. some people pretend that they don’t realize that there are people behind them and don’t hold the door. some people pretend like they’re carrying too many books in their hands or they don’t want to spill the coffee they are carrying and pretend to want to hold the door but don’t. i think this charade begins to get intricate when you pretend to want to do something. then there are people who, perhaps holding a book or briefcase as a prop, pretend that they are trying to hold the door but miss or it slips out of their grasp, and they walk on. if you’ve seen this, you know how ridiculous it is. sometimes you’re walking maybe five to ten feet behind someone whilst approaching the door and they open the door and look back to see if anyone is behind them and see you and decide whether to stand their with the door open until you get there or whether to just go. it’s hard because once the person walking towards the door sees the person at the door look back at them, the person at the door pretty much is obligated to wait otherwise they come off as a jerk. but sometimes they do exactly that, decide it’s not worth their time and walk on. sometimes they aren’t willing to wait but they hold the door open for a couple of seconds before walking through, pretending that they have misjudged how long it will take the person to reach the door and take advantage of the door-holding. this is again, in my opinion, ridiculous. today i saw for the first time this guy wave me away from the door i was holding for him, not wanting me to stay and waste five more seconds waiting for him to get there. that was interesting, i’ve never seen it before. so to summarize, just don’t be fake about it. if you are willing to hold the door, do so. if you’re not, don’t pretend like you want to/are trying to/are not able to/thought you did but really didn’t. pretending to hold the door is a low for mankind. you’re better than that.
