perfecto prep
did anyone watch the baby looney tunes? i don’t know the official name but it had buster bunny and babs bunny and little versions of donald duck and tasmanian devil and they all went to elementary school….well maybe you haven’t seen it but it was a show to be reckoned with. it had the classroom scene, with paper airplanes and making fun of the teacher and getting sent to the principal. it had after schools scenes where the children would get together and flood the bully’s rabbit hole or build a time machine out of carrots and leaves. and then they had their football team. i don’t remember who played what position but i do remember they had uniforms and helmets and babs, the girl rabbit, played too and apparently no one made a fuss about it so that’s a good life lesson for the children who saw the show. but they would always show this football team playing when it had a showdown with its bitter rival, perfecto prep. perfecto prep i’m guessing was the private school for that district and its players were snooty and mean and a bunch of cheaters. and they would arrive at the baby looney tunes’ school in a stretched limousine, that’s how snooty they were. and they would always have black uniforms and black helmets and this football game was like the show’s representation of the ultimate battle between good and evil. and perfecto prep always won by like 50 so i don’t know what the show was trying to imply. but there would always be like a side story, like perfecto prep secretly tried to bribe buster to join their school and play for their team or the captain of perfecto prep asked babs to the prom or something like that. but if you ever saw the saturday morning show hang time, they would often play an opponent dressed in black that would cheat or commit hard fouls. and other shows and movies, too, that had like a sports team playing against a superior and vilified opponent would show up to the game to find their opponent dressed in black. so the spirit of perfecto prep resonated through many other shows, movies. perfecto prep was the pioneer of sorts of this all-black, pure evil adversary. they wore the eye black under their eyes. they had tattoos. every player looked exactly the same. i’m not sure what specie of animal they were, but i’m sure it was an evil specie, like a bobcat or a beaver. and they were always perfect. they always came into town in their stretched limousine with an undefeated record and a defense that hadn’t given up a single point in the season. there are real life perfecto preps, of course. i think we all know one. i think the only way that this whole thing can have a happy ending is if perfecto prep loses. i don’t quite know how it will happen. but perfecto prep must lose. then they will have to change their name to imperfecto prep. and they will have a lot more trouble recruiting the blue chip animal football prospects because no one will want to play at a school named imperfecto. they deserve it. think they’re so big. anyone who is a badger can look tough with eye black and tattoos.
